I went onto Amazon and ordered writing supplies. A dozen metaphors. A box of alliteration. A can of foreshadowing. An entire prologue for a book I haven't written.
They screwed up my order and sent an entire case of ellipses. I found several misplaced modifiers and a set of quotation marks I had no use for. I called and complained and was offered free shipping on my next one.
I ordered a mail order bride named Tamika from the East Indies. Instead, they sent me Ernie, an accountant from Beth Page. He hogs the TV and demands to do my taxes. I am so fed up. Plus, I found a dangling participle at the bottom of his air holed box.
How is Amazon so successful?
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