Eggnog

As a diabetic, I'm not supposed to have eggnog. Too much sugar. But how do you make it through the holidays without at least one glass? The problem is stopping at one. I know they've come up with eggnog ice cream and probably eggnog coffee. I'm hoping for eggnog toothpaste, gravy, soup, stuffing, stew, deodorant, moisturizer, body lotion, pizza topping, tile spray, whipped cream--you get the idea.
Another item probably not good for you that you can't stop eating is Wasabi almonds. I'm not sure if Wasabi is a country or something researchers created. They're hot and salty and cause great thirst, but once you've had them you never go back to smoked almonds.
Unsalted saltines are light as marshmallows, easily devoured by the dozen. It feels like you're crunching air, unlike peanut butter crackers, which are never actually digested. They just set up a table and play cards in your small intestine for years.
There are certain people on TV like Chelsea Handler you know you shouldn't be watching because they supply no intellectual nutrition, but you're too weak to stop. The hope is someday she'll snap and flash the audience. I just pray I'm not sipping eggnog when it happens. Spillage of that elixir would be a tragedy.