Faking Testosterone

Men:
1.Do not shave between your eyebrows.
2.Grunt when getting out of chairs.
3.Never make Broadway musical references
4.Do not hesitate when confronted by a revolving door.
5.Kill spiders without remorse.
6.Never name your dog Pincus.
7.Never snicker when you can belly laugh.
8.Get yourself a belly.
9.Learn to whistle long and hard.
10.Master your beer suds.
11.Do not interrupt a woman with something on her mind.
12.No socks worn over the calf.
13.Challenge a teen to one on one basketball.
14.Slap on your cologne with panache.
15.Never use the word panache in front of other men.
16.Work on your handshake.
17.Wear plaid as often as possible.
18.Buy power tools.
19.Do not purchase a goldfish.
20.Do not turn your clock back just because you're told to.