I needed to declutter and trim the fat from my life. Simplify things so I could have more time to write.
I informed six distant relatives I was dead to them. I unfriended 420 people. I only wash one armpit each day and do not shave under my chin to save time. My gym workout now consists of flexing my calves and stretching my neck. I tossed out my Futons for Dummies book and old photos of frat buddies holding wooden paddles.
I've cleaned out all my belly button lint. Extracting my butt crack lint is an ongoing process.
What's that? You'll never shake hands with me again? So be it. Writing comes first.
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