Saturday, October 27, 2012

Buried With...

Augie was buried with his rake and Charles with his hedge clippers. Appropriate. They fought over Augie raking leaves onto Charles' property and the later carving hedges into geese figures. Augie hit him in the head with the rake, Charles sliced off his neighbor's arm at the elbow and he bled to death.
Bill was buried with his wife's dentures atop his chest because she wanted to have the last word. Eunice had her deceased pet yorkie in the casket until it woke up and yapped at mourners. Cal was sprinkled with his beloved Rice Krispies, Mike lay there in his Burger King uniform. Lauren took along her vibrator in case she got bored in the next world. Rumor has it Jack LaLanne was buried with his juicer and Steve Jobs with his I-phone in case his successor had a marketing problem.
My grandmother was buried in her apron, symbolic of how hard she worked. She also included her bowling ball and a shot glass. She played hard too.

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