Fellow citizens, this country is now $20 trillion in debt. We must think outside the box.
Sell Alaska. Sell Guam. Sell the air space over Gov. Christie. Sell Puert Rico and the Virgin Islands. Hell, sell Long Island. We already have New Jersey.
Do we really need five Great Lakes. Sell them to Canada. Sell some of our poets to Third World countries. Sell a few of our celebrities. Larry King, Ray Romano, Cloris Leachman, Ryan Seacrest, Michael Strahan.
There must be some rivers we can spare. All those gazebos covered with bird crap--gone.
How will our kids deal with this debt? They may just start selling senior citizens.
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