Poets on the Roof

We had a meeting about the poets on our roof. We had no idea how they got up there. This is our apartment building and they had no business ruining our quiet with shouting and arguments. Maybe they were just loud readers, but that's not the point. Trespassers can not be tolerated.
Sometimes one will stand at the edge and toss down poems. Egoists. Just creating more paper trash.They order pizza and the delivery guy keeps ringing my bell late at night. He has to find his way up there without dropping the pizza and then curses loudly on the way out because the cheap bastards never tip.
I was elected to speak to them. I somehow found their secret stairs to the roof and when I opened the trap door I was confronted by raggedy, wild looking men and women who demanded to know if I was a poet. I told them I delivered mail and had to get up early. One raised his cane and I thought he'd strike me, but he began ranting in his stentorian voice. I had no idea what he was talking about. I threatened legal action and they laughed. No one arrests poets, I was informed.
We finally reached a compromise. No loud arguments, no late night pizza deliveries, and no dancing. I just threw that one in. Only haiku poets dance, I was told.
I wished they'd find some basement, but they are all infested with musicians.
I need to stop here. My drum circle is meeting on the lawn.

Dancing in the Moonlight

Alice led Ralph up three flights of stairs to the roof.
"Honey, you know I can't dance."
"Oh, be quiet. You never take me anywhere anymore. We haven't gone dancing in ages."
Alice loosened his tie, removed his cap, and took off his jacket. Ralph was flushed and sweating, out of shape.
"Pretend Perry Como is singing "Temptation." She put his arm around her waist and led him across the roof, silhouetted by light and shadow. Ralph let her put her head on his shoulder. Life in a tiny Brooklyn apartment did not lend itself to many magic moments, but this was one of them.
Until the trap door opened and two figures climbed out.
"Ralphie boy! Seems like we all had the same idea. Plenty of room up here. Me and Trixie need to work on some moves."
Ralph grimaced. "Norton! Get out of here!"
Norton shrugged. "You don't own this roof. If you can dance up here, so can we. Let's shake it, Trixie."
They launched into a wild cha cha.
Ralph and Alice sighed and continued slow dancing, but some of the magic was gone.

Off the Roof

Please get off the roof. I'm sorry I said some things and ignored your feelings. We were happy once, doing the hully gully on Saturday night at the rec center. Now all we do is fight.
Stomping on my tomato plants was low. Now you're up there threatening to plunge into my flower bed.
Be sensible. If you do that I'll set fire to your workbench, glue your gloves together, hide all the nails and screws. Not that I'm vindictive.
It's not too late to return to what we were. I still remember all the hully gully moves. Come on down, honey. Let's be a family again.
Stop! Don't do that. Put it away right now.
Nice. Wonderful. Peeing on my flowers is very productive. Say goodbye to your power saw. This negotiation is over.
What are you doing? Those are hully gully moves. On our roof with everyone watching. You really know how to push my buttons. Now I recall why I married you. All that boyish charm. Plus you're hung like a rhino.