John decided to get his wife a vending machine for Christmas. He waited until Small Business Saturday and found Ricardo's Vending about two miles away. John had managed his own business focusing on refolding road maps for those minus dexterity. Once GPS came, maps were passe and he went bankrupt. But he rebounded by creating a Keep Out sign business and in these times he was swamped with orders.
Ricardo was a pony tailed middle aged man wearing a Hugh Hefner Lives t-shirt. John explained he wanted something special for his wife.
Ricardo showed him four machines. One only spouted tiny live lobsters. Another had only Victor Mature movies, a third contained various perfumes. The fourth, possibly the only one on the East coast, distributed sex toys and vibrators.
John thought it through. Laura was allergic to lobsters. She preferred Charlton Heston to Victor Mature. There were many bottles of perfume in their bedroom. No, it would have to be the vibrator/sex toy machine. On long trips attending sign conventions, he got lonely. So did his wife. This machine solved both issues.
As the invoice was being written, John politely asked whether the objects inside were brand new.
Ricardo looked up and shrugged. Shall we say, gently used?
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