Wednesday, October 5, 2016

Short to Long

Ottoman.
Say again?
Need an ottoman.
And why is that?
Honey, it's my circulation.
I told you to stop smoking.
That is easier said than done, sweetie.
Can't you see I'm on the phone, Lenny?
Is this too much to ask a man's wife?
I'm sick of dragging that ottoman over to you.
Well, I'm sick  of listening you gossip on the phone.
Lenny, since you retired from tree trimming you've been driving me nuts.
Suddenly this is all about your needs when all I ask for is compassion.
You've stolen the best years of my life with your complaining and incessant neediness.
I pray to God every night a lightning bolt will shoot down ending this hell.
I'm calling my lawyer and telling her every detail of every failure you have carelessly created.
I am going to get off this couch and drive straight to the nearest lake and drown.

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