I bought Cary Grant's slippers at an auction and they fit perfectly.I took a walk and women swooned. My posture was better, my smile bigger. At my coffee shop I spoke in an English accent and gracefully sipped my brew. I ordered a croissant, not a bagel. I said Good Day and Beautiful Morning. I nodded and chuckled. I never chuckle.
For no reason I rose and did a skipping dance right out the door. People applauded. I just knew as long as I wore these slippers I'd never cut myself shaving or pass wind. I changed the part in my hair. I think I'm getting a dimple.
Obviously, I have to get a tux.
Oh, I've stopped wearing socks with said slippers.
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