Surgeons attached the sinus opening of an orangutang behind my right ear to facilitate mucus drainage. I was tired of a stuffy nose and sinus infections. The orangutang have huge openings, much larger than the anteater. That surgery failed.
They also implanted extra hair in that area to disguise the opening. The only difference besides better breathing is when I'm aroused, mucus flows out of the opening. So if a lady puts her arms around my neck it gets sticky fast. Some women are flattered, even excited they can cause such body fluid reaction.
However, when I'm wearing my earplugs on public transportation and listening the audio version of an erotic book, subsequent mucus emissions from the back of my ear illicit disparaging remarks about my personal hygiene.
Needless to say, I carry tissue everywhere.
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