Sunday, April 27, 2014

Ease Into It

First, take your Q-Tip and gingerly examine it , making sure the cotton is immaculate. Gently insert it into your ear and carefully twist. Remove it and check for yellow or orange wax. Purple or blue wax is a red flag. Repeat the process in the other ear. Globs of ear wax may be genetic. Ask your grandparents about their wax situation.
Scraggly nose hair is attacked briskly with a high quality tweezers. It will hurt for a moment, but think of how many weeks it will take for another to replace it. Be aggressive.
That boil on your forehead needs a sterilized needle. One quick pop and have tissue handy to collect the pus pouring down your face.
The point here is not to panic when addressing the more disgusting aspects of being human. And we haven't even gotten to the neck yet.

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