I hate when people show up at outdoor concerts and just spread their blanket right next to your folding chair, their germ laden blanket. Entire families make themselves perfectly comfortable in what had been your space. Then they remove shoes and socks and take out tons of food and drink. Their kids race around with no purpose, making strange noises and gesticulating like crazed traffic cops.
Bah!
I get it. You are a loving family living a rich, full life and I'm an old guy in a wide brimmed hat designed to keep my ears protected from the sun. Sometimes they'll stand and dance in place. Then I'll either have to also stand to see anything or sit there and mutter curses, hunched like a crumpled napkin.
When people are that close, you are privy to insipid conversations. What some idiot at work did, what their first cousin said at some stupid wedding.
I'm going to get Lyme Disease from these people. I know one of their kids will run into my shin and I'll get blamed. Maybe I can subtlety trip one.
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