My old Hyundai Accent had personality. When it felt ignored, the Check Engine light would flash on. On cold mornings it sounded like Morgan Freeman with a head cold. It's old car smell blended with my old man smell. Seat cushions slid forward, my safety strap got tangled and I noticed strange stains on the dashboard.
My Civic is a year old and except for flat tires, has exhibited no desire for attention. It did moan when I spray painted over a few scratches, but nothing I try has broken the ice between us. It is just very businesslike.
My old micro had personality in the form of chili and gravy stains all over the inside I was too lazy to clean. I replaced it with a black one to match my black radio, table, fridge side, and my black car. I am not a devil worshiper.
Sometimes I'll just pop it open for no reason because I like the power. My toaster and I have lively discussions. Once a month I flip it over and empty the crumbs. My toaster is an atheist. It's logic is simple. What kind of sick God would create all those crumbs?
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