Dripping Bundle

Ishmael cringed when the man clomped in with his wooden leg. Every Wednesday, same time, same guy. Same dripping bundle.
The bearded, craggy fellow was always dressed in black. Ishmael was the only waiter on duty, so once again he would try to convince the man this was a vegan restaurant. They did not cook or serve whale meat.
The man shoved the bundle into his arms. "My dinner," he growled.
"Sir, I explained to you many times before about our policy of not serving meat. Whales are mammals, not fish. How about a steaming bowl of Brussels sprouts?"
The fellow rose to his full height. "You land lubbing cabbage. I will teach you respect for a seafaring man."
He pulled a mini-harpoon from his jacket and was about to fire when Ishmael decided reasoning with this maniac was useless. He grabbed a lit candle from the next table and tossed it at the frothing fisherman, whose reflexes were dulled by Xanax.
Second degree burns resulted. Two months later, after healing, the man returned without any bundle. Instead, he offered the waiter a position on his ship. Ishmael immediately accepted. Adventure was there to be had.
"Do you mind if I take notes on board?" he asked.
Ahab grunted, which he took as a yes. The rest is history.