Monday, July 6, 2015

Just Married

All around me people are getting married. I felt left out, so I called my long time friend Wilma.
Do you want to get married?
I'm not sure. Do you have a penis?
Of course I do.
Because a penis is very important in marriage.
I sense you doubt me.
What if it doesn't work out?
I'll rent a bigger penis.
I meant the marriage.
We'll desolve it.
Who pays for the lawyer?
We split it.
It was your idea. You pay.
We'll do it at city hall.
I want a bridal shower.
I would have a bachelor party, except I don't have any friends.
What day should we do it?
How about Wednesday?
I have my book discussion group. Thursday I'm getting my hair done. Friday I'm visiting my sister in long Island.
Maybe we should think about this. Marriage is scary.
I;m expecting a really nice ring.
I was thinking along the line of a firm handshake.



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