If each of us creates one job, think of how the economy would bounce back.
I wracked my brain trying to come up with jobs that would gainfully employ someone. This is what I came up with. Organizing my paintings by color. Dusting my collection of sea shells. Telling me I'm in denial when I refuse to see reality. Making sure my key rings are located in the same drawer. Answer the phone when telemarketers try to sell me used tire rims.
Cooking fish in any way, shape or form. Cleaning up my gravy stains. Debating why Germany is the only European country that can make cars and doesn't owe money. When I'm tired of reading, finish off chapters. Blog for me when I'm lacking an idea. Check me daily for insect infestation. Rotate my sofa cushions, sheets, soap holders, shoe rack. Wipe me down with a cold wash cloth when I'm flushed with embarrassment. Accompany me to parties and feed me good conversation openers.
Test my mouthwash for contaminants. Explain the more sophisticated funnies. Serve as my stanchion during high wind advisory warnings. Cover my feet with a blanket at 3am. Take apart my arguments with flawless logic. Perform karaoke for me in public places. Trim my eyebrows.
I haven't worked out salary or benefits, but I'm offering ten days off. Unless I need you to shovel snow.
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