Twenty six people on the parade council, all with an agenda..
Union workers in front? Where to put the Boy Scouts? The Elks Club? Veterans of Foreign Wars? What walking pace so the elderly could keep up? How big the floats, how many floats?
How many beauty queens, how much stiff waving?
Where do the transgender people go? Should they be separated from the transvestites?
How many politicians, cops, firemen, and EMS workers? Should there be bagpipes?
Are DPW trucks really necessary?
Where do we place Ralph Fanucci, our oldest citizen? Should we risk including tax assessors, lawyers and car salesmen? Should candy be tossed at the crowd?
How much is this going to run us in insurance?
After hours of shouting, cursing, pushing and threats, a decision was made to shelve the whole thing and substitute a town wide picnic.
Then arguments ensued over whether to include avocados in the mix.
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